Gentlemen in Training
I get a fair amount of comments along the lines of, "You've got three boys? That must be crazy!" Or, "Wow, three boys," accompanied by a head shake of disbelief, "My one boy is wild enough for me. I don't know how you do it!" Etc, etc. I was surprised when I first started getting these types of comments because they really did not reflect my own personal experience with my children and I truly felt that any "sympathy" was misplaced.
I usually tried to explain, "My boys are actually really good boys...I wouldn't describe them as wild and crazy...Sure they've got plenty of energy, but it's typically very well channeled...Sure things get crazy sometimes but overall they're pretty well behaved...etc, etc." Nobody ever really seemed to believe me though, and it started to get kind of frustrating to keep running up against this stereotype.
So, I am pleased to report that I have finally come up with a response that seems to convey what I am trying to get across just fine. It is to tell those who would be sympathetic to my "plight" that MY boys are three Gentlemen in Training. And guess what? It works great! So far, people seem to really like this and have responded well. I am then able to explain the other stuff, like that they're not really wild and crazy, etc. and they seem to get it. Amazing! It's a good feeling for me and my boys to finally be understood.
Now if I can only figure out how to get a certain Gentleman to dry his hands without leaving the hand towel on the floor, that would be great. But we're working on it, and he almost always opens doors for me which is so very Gentlemanly and makes me so very proud.
I usually tried to explain, "My boys are actually really good boys...I wouldn't describe them as wild and crazy...Sure they've got plenty of energy, but it's typically very well channeled...Sure things get crazy sometimes but overall they're pretty well behaved...etc, etc." Nobody ever really seemed to believe me though, and it started to get kind of frustrating to keep running up against this stereotype.
So, I am pleased to report that I have finally come up with a response that seems to convey what I am trying to get across just fine. It is to tell those who would be sympathetic to my "plight" that MY boys are three Gentlemen in Training. And guess what? It works great! So far, people seem to really like this and have responded well. I am then able to explain the other stuff, like that they're not really wild and crazy, etc. and they seem to get it. Amazing! It's a good feeling for me and my boys to finally be understood.
Now if I can only figure out how to get a certain Gentleman to dry his hands without leaving the hand towel on the floor, that would be great. But we're working on it, and he almost always opens doors for me which is so very Gentlemanly and makes me so very proud.
posted by Leslie | 11:59 AM
8 Comments:
I get the same disbelief when I tell people that I refuse to have poorly-behaved children; I'll have to come up with a better way to put it.
So sweet and I love the explaination! And you two definitely do have gentlmen in training.
such a great response. Please share how you refuse to have poorly-behaved children. It looks like you are doing a great job!
It's fairly simple: I don't let them get away with poor behavior. I model good behavior and give them options, and consequences for further poor behavior.
Example from lunch: Daniel says "I'll scratch your face" to Joshua. I say, "That's not an appropriate thing to say. 'I'll do something nice for you today, Joshua' is a much better thing to say."
Daniel: "I'll do something nice for you today, Joshua."
Joshua: "You made him say that!"
The trick is to put the right amount of menace in your voice when you say "That's inappropriate." If there's something they need to do and aren't doing it (like getting ready for the bath or coming when I call) I will start counting to 5, increasing the menace in my tone for 3 and 4. The boys know I'll be angry by the time I reach 5, so they come right away when I start counting. I haven't reached 5 in almost a year.
Thank you. I will work on my voice intonations.
I have 3 boys too! And they are so sweet loving I have no idea why people say "whoa" to 3 boys. I really like your explaination. When people say to me "you have your hands full" I just say "I like it that way!"
PS to Jake- maybe that works for you, but my kids LIKE it when I sound angry. And they used to get naughty, just to hear the sound. Things are a lot calmer now that I figured that out.
You DO have some of the best behaved little boys I've ever met. Kudos to you! They have great examples to look up to - so no surprise here that they are so well behaved. I would think anyone who knows you wouldnt be surprised at all.
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